Dependent Child or Independent Adult?

Regardless of whether you think the health care reform bill (link to actual bill, in case you wanted to read thousands of pages of legalese) is the right or wrong kind of change our health care system needs, there are huge changes affecting pretty much everyone’s life.

I want to focus not on the pros and cons of the bill, but on one of the least insured demographics: young people under the age of 26. This demographic is one of the least insured for a variety of reasons, including: unable to get coverage on parents’ policy, unable to get affordable coverage at new jobs, unable to get immediate coverage at new jobs (a sort of trial period to make sure you’re sticking with the company), and even young people’s sense of invincibility (I’m healthy, so why bother with insurance when I have a dozen other bills to pay?). Under the new law, persons under the age of 26 can be on their parents’ health care policy even if they are no longer attending school.

This change is huge for me because I graduated two years ago, I have not yet found full time employment with health care benefits, and my parents’ policy won’t cover adult children (is that an oxymoron?) who are no longer in school. The new bill, for me, means I can go to the doctor without paying for the whole visit out of my own pocket. But it also means that I’m still dependent on my parents.

The change to allow adult children coverage on their parents’ health insurance raises some interesting questions about when children are no longer children? When do we get to be adults?

Here are some common rights of passage into adulthood:

• The freedom of a driver’s license at 16 (in Minnesota, it’s older in some states)
• The opportunity to have a voice in government by voting at 18
• The honor and duty of serving one’s country through military service at 18
• The (sometimes foolishly) fun thrill of gambling our first dollar at 18 (in Minnesota, it’s 21 in some states)
• The satisfaction and responsibility that comes with our first legal alcoholic drink at 21

Then there are those rights of passage that come at different ages, but generally happen for the first time between the ages of 18 and 35: buying a car, owning a home, having a baby.

And what about being considered an adult in the church? Once you’ve had your confirmation or bar/bat mitzvah you have adult status in your faith – and that can be as early as 13!

Is having one’s own health care coverage a new right of passage into adulthood? Are we destined to be not quite full-fledged adults until we’re 26? Is someone who starts working full time right after high school and gets his own health insurance more of an adult than someone who goes to college or even gets his career started while remaining on his parent’s coverage?

I’ve always thought of myself as a fairly mature and independent person – someone who could take care of herself without mom and dad’s help by early adolescence. But all this talk about defining when a child becomes an adult has me wondering when I’ll ever be considered an adult in the eyes of the majority?

Obviously adulthood and becoming an adult is a process, and for some people the process is longer than others. The length of the process is affected by not only one’s personal maturity level and personal motivation (picture the 35 year old living in his parent’s basement eating Cheetos and watching Wrestlemania), but also by social norms, economic stability, and government mandate.

I’ll tackle government mandate first: by law you can and cannot do certain things until you reach a certain age (see the first rights of passage list above). Done.

Social norms and economic stability are ever-changing factors, and thus are a little harder to define and impose on a vast majority. So I’m going to make some generalizations here, but please don’t take them as the be-all-end-all definitions.

Let’s consider getting married and having kids. Back in the day it was normal for couples to get married right after high school and start having kids. Now, with opportunities like college and a more socially acceptable attitude towards birth control and cohabitation before marriage, a lot of couples don’t get married until their late 20s or 30s. As I said, this is not a be-all-end-all definition – I have several friends under the age of 25 who are married and own homes. This is where economic stability comes in. My friends who are already married (or planning to marry soon) have at least one person in the relationship with a stable income.

In discussing this topic with older friends and relatives, they said they can remember aunts and uncles or other relatives who, after getting married and in some instances after having kids, where forced to move back in with a parent because they couldn’t afford to live in their own home. Were these distant relatives any less of adults because they lived at a parent’s home? Am I any less of an adult than my married friends because in six months I’ll more than likely be back on my parents’ insurance policy?

The new law mandates that insurance companies must allow persons under the age of 26 coverage on their parents’ health insurance, but young people don’t have to accept that coverage. Some will take the coverage because economically it makes sense. What about the social acceptability of the matter? Not that 25-year-olds are going to broadcast to the world that they are insured by their parents (or maybe they will on Twitter). But it’s hard to reconcile with one’s self the complexity of being dependent children when in so many other areas of our lives we are independent adults.

A long time ago a young man may have entered adulthood at 18 by leaving the family farm, getting married, and settling into a new life of his own. Nowadays, it’s much more complicated and it seems adulthood is indefinable, at least not by making one age or life event the mile marker for everyone.  Just because you can vote or go to a bar, doesn't mean you are a fully independent or fully mature adult. Everyone reaches adulthood on their own time.

So is 26 really the age when most young people are able to reasonably afford their own health insurance? What if my career doesn’t take off (or for that matter start) until I’m 25 or 26? Will I be able to afford “adult health insurance”? Should the government or for that matter insurance agencies mandate when individuals can afford their own insurance? I guess we’ll see in the next couple of years how much this health care reform really does for allowing us kids to become economically responsible adults.

My Personal Responsibility Pledge

A few weeks ago, in a rage, I wanted to write a post about personal responsibility and people’s apparent lack of it. Without getting too much into my rant: I believe older folks sometimes have a negative image of younger generations because we don’t take responsibility for our actions and we don’t learn from our mistakes (this is a generalization, I know plenty who do both). We’ve also come to expect a lot of things in our life. We expect to be given an education, we expect to be given freedom, and we expect to be treated fairly and righteously. We take these things for granted.

Now, I’m not saying that we shouldn’t expect some basic rights, but I feel there’s a lot of expectation and not a lot of giving. Sure some people are all about giving back to Mother Earth, volunteering their time, etc. But that’s not the giving I’m talking about. Younger generations need to start forming a sense of personal responsibility. You have a responsibility to yourself to take charge of your life and not rely on someone else to be there when you fall.

Personal responsibility doesn’t mean shutting out the world around you, and it doesn’t mean being selfish. You can be socially responsible while still accepting responsibilities for actions in your personal life as well. I attended a political event back in September put on by the Young Americans for Liberty where they showed an “I Pledge” video. I jotted a few notes during the video and some things that stood out for me:

“I pledge to remember the price of liberty is responsibility”

“I pledge to remember that wanting to keep your own money isn’t greed and spending other people’s money isn’t compassion”

So partially inspired by my fit of rage a few weeks back and also by the Young American’s for Liberty I Pledge video, the following is my personal responsibility pledge (or what I pledge to do to take charge of my own life and to give and not just receive or expect):

1. I pledge to work hard and make myself financially independent, to pursue my dream and never accept hand outs, bail outs, or any other form of public money
2. I pledge to open an emergency medical account to cover the unexpected, never to rely on others for my own well being
3. I pledge to start saving for the future with my first real pay check and continue to save so that I won’t leach off the fruits of another man’s labor
4. I pledge to live within or below my means so that I will never have to rely on others to fund my independence
5. I pledge to shop sales, cut coupons, and be a responsible, savvy consumer
6. I pledge to own my mistakes and apologize to those affected by them
7. I pledge to value experiences over material items
8. I pledge to contribute to my children’s education, both academic and otherwise
9. I pledge to cook and eat healthily whenever possible, to never blame others for the choices I make about my nutrition and well-being
10. I pledge to read and be an informed citizen of the world
11. I pledge to vote and make informed decisions on candidates, to have an open mind and listen to others, and to form my own opinion and think for myself
12. I pledge to be a lifelong learner, to never find myself without the skills to transition into new industries or more advanced positions in my own
13. I pledge to take seriously the freedoms I am given and act responsibly in order to retain those freedoms
14. I pledge to honor and support those charged with defending and maintaining my freedom and safety, never to take for granted the service they provide
15. I pledge to set a responsible and strong example for my children so they might come to pledge their own personal responsibilities one day, to lead by example
16. I pledge to set up a major purchases savings account, to never spontaneously make a major purchase, and ensure I am prepared to handle the expense
17. I pledge to expect the unexpected and plan accordingly, never turning to others for a solution or quick-fix
18. I pledge to act with common sense, never blaming others for mistakes or misfortunes I could have prevented or eased
19. I pledge to not feel sorry for myself or my situation, but rather to take charge and be the change I want in my life
20. I pledge to respect life, wisdom, and knowledge, and to never endanger, mock, or eschew the sanctity and greatness of each

I encourage all Gen Y’ers and even those younger to reflect on what you want to do in order to take responsibility for your life, to give and not just receive. It is becoming increasingly difficult to expect anything, so think about it now and stop to taking liberty for granted.

And I will close with another snippet from the Young American’s for Liberty video:

 “I will not live for the sake of another man nor ask another man to live for mine”